Back Pressure

As i was driving this morning, or more accurately: while idling at a stop light I could feel my car shake. It reminded me ever so gently that I have a hole in my exhaust. I am sure that small hole in my muffler is from dragging it across concrete or some other hard surface. My little car sets so close to the ground, it is rather awkward to get in and out of. (which would be much cooler if it was a sports car or somethng really fast)

but that tiny hole affects how the car runs. Often people speak of "back pressure" but that isn't exactly true. Smart people and real car people know it is about velocity and how your exhaust flows out. They confuse the idea with back pressure because there is release somewhere that minimizes the outflow (velocity) in the correct place.

I think of that mislabeled Back Pressure as the thing that keeps us together (as if my life were the exhaust system of a car). From the exhaust manifold to the muffer and the tail pipe, and everything in between is trying to guide that exhaust out in right place.

have you ever had an exhaust leak? Have you had the smell of the exhaust permeate the cab of your vehicle? It obviously wasn't coming out in the right place...

We seldom want things to contain us, or force us through a series of bends and dips. Much like the gases expelled from an engine we need just that. It may not be a metal tube, but rather likely it is people. It may not be a muffler, but it may structure around us.

It isnt really "back pressure" but it is something that pushes back and doesnt allow us to do whatever we want or even what we would do naturally. What do gases do? well they are governed by laws and rules of science. lighter gases rise and denser ones sink, unless otherwise directed.

More than I like to admit I have have exhaust leaks in my life. Places where some of my was going where I was not intended to be. It may have even been "natural" (mostly because of our fallen sin nature). But my life and its intended outflow were diminished.

We can take out cars and trucks, even motorcycles to an exhaust shop to repair rusted metal, a scraped muffler or a bent pipe. As Christians we need the Word of God, time in His presence and the people around us, to help us flow in the right direction...

I am not fast

I was significantly faster when was younger. But old age and lack of physical activity are getting the best of me.

But that is not what I really want to talk about. I want to talk about a "fast" or the spiritual discipline of fasting.

fast 2 (definition found at http://www.thefreedictionary.com/fasting)
(fst)
intr.v. fast·ed, fast·ing, fasts
1. To abstain from food.
2. To eat very little or abstain from certain foods, especially as a religious discipline.
n.
1. The act or practice of abstaining from or eating very little food.
2. A period of such abstention or self-denial.
[Middle English fasten, from Old English fæstan; see past- in Indo-European roots.]


I am not good at fasting, nor am I fast. While I may have been faster when I was younger, I have never really been good at fasting. I always want to do it for the wrong reasons. I am not a large man, but I often think that i can get double duty out of my fasting. The idea is to rely on God to be your source during the fast, focusing on Him, not weight loss. I tend to think of the latter. Often when I try and fast I spend more time thinking about when I can eat or what I can eat, depending on the type of fast. Again, pretty much missing the point.

Denial of self is good, it is helpful, when done right. If i walk around bragging about my fast, my focus is on ME, not God. If I think about the weight I am losing, then I am, again, focused on ME, not God. If I do not spend extra time in prayer, rather thinking about what I can eat, I am amiss.

Yesterday, I read a sports article about the top ten religious athletes, including Tebow, the Minister of Defense, Sandy Koufax and Hakeem Olajuwon. The piece on Olajuwon mentioned that he would fast through the month of Ramadan as per his Muslim faith and still play basketball. It said he would "play without food or water" for the month. Obviously nobody can survive a month without water, especially while playing a vigorous sport like professional basketball. The fast is from Dawn til dusk. This is still an impressive feat.

At times I have "fasted" thinks other than food. I gave up Facebook for a month one year. I felt like God wanted me to. So I did a beginning of the year fast from FB. It was great for me. More time to focus on other things, most importantly God.

I enjoy food. I really do. Is food distracting me from God like Facebook was? I doubt it. But for a few weeks here at the beginning of 2012 I have given up certain foods. I pray that I come out closer to God, hearing His voice more clearly and more dependant on Him.

While I could stand to lose a few pounds, and It will likely happen, I am not allowing that to be a focal point. In fact I am "fasting" from weighing myself. Realizing that probably sounds very strange, I have to admit I check my weight like a dieting teenage girl, something else I would like to change.

My Misplaced Sympathy for Joe Paterno

i want to say, what has been alledged is horrendous and if it is true (which it seems it is) Sandusky is a vile human being.

I have not read the 23 page grand jury report, I dont not need to hear the descriptions of what happened. But What i would like to know is what people knew...

Joe obviously knew something. McQueary told him something. What exactlyt was it?

People say, "He admitted he wished he had done more, he knew." I understand. Hindsight is 20/20. Have you ever years down the line put two and two together and realized, "oh, dang, how did I miss that before?" Everyone looks at it as if he was in the shower with Sandusky watching.

I always hope for the best and want to be full of grace. We live in a land where people are inoccent until proven guilty and yet everyone (outside of Penn State) wants Joe crucified. I dont have a problem with removing him as coach, figure this stuff out, PLEASE!

Again back to my optimistic outlook. Joe hears from a grad student something is amiss, he reports it to his superiors and some changes are made. Obviously not enough changes, but one might think, "Hey, the school looked into it, this is what they found, this is what they decided, okay, the situation is handled."
I know, very naive.

On the radio one personality said, "people around Sandusky knew, they always know." That isnt a fair statement. We all have secrets, dark parts of ourselves that we hide. People with sicknesses like the one Sandusky seems to have, usually work really hard at hiding it. There might be clues that people might see, but those people dont go around talking about thier sickness in their regular life.

I guess I hope for the best.

Sadly, we may never really know what happened and who really knew what and when.

Obviously McQueary didnt see enough of an issue to keep him from working with Joe...

My heart still breaks for the families. the lives that have been tainted and innocence lost.

politics schmolitics

I read a facebook note/post/comment whatever where a friend of mine said that he has not "voted for" someone in a a long time, rather he has "voted against" a candidate.

I loathe politics. Its bothersome and mostly leads to quarreling, which gets nowhere.

the idea of picking the lesser of two evils is so much fun. Now I understand many people out there really believe in their politics (party affiliation etc) and see it as useful. Me, not so much.

I recently posted about the OWS ordeal and I agree something needs to change. Here is the problem, things dont really change. why? Because people are still people. We are selfish, greedy, jealous and worse. Few people can endure the pressure AND power of leading.

The honest ones give up and the "great ones" are corrupted. The system wears on you. And we are all still human.

Would it be awesome to clean house and get rid of all the politicians in Washington? maybe. Are there people who can and would do a better job? probably? Would I vote for any of them? Possibly.

After my rousing encouragements, i dont understand why more decent people do not run for office... other than the money to afford it and the popularity to get them to the end.

I dont know what to do. i mean other than pray.

America was designed to keep any individual or group from holding all the power... now they just play games with the powers they hold and harm everyone else. Most politicians in Washington have more than me... but they need me. Well they only need me if there is someone willing to run against them....

meh... politics.

I am the _____ %

I see all the clever notes, for this side or that. I know which numbers I cannot relate to, yet at the same time I struggle relating to the "other" side.

Statistically, I am a part of the "larger" percent, you know the one with the smaller percentage of everything. Part of the reason I havent written this blog already is because I wanted to do some more research, but Life has kept me from that endeavor, So I will ask questions, you know the ones I wanted to research:
What percentage of the world...
Owns a home?
Owns two or more cars?
has a job that pays more than $100 a week?
Has more shoes than days of the week?
Has more shirts than days in a month?
Has a TV (this one was a gift, but i still have one, or three - all gifts)?
Has cable and internet in their home?

I went to a private college and graduated more than ten years ago and I am still paying off that debt. Of course my line of work doesnt typically pay yearly what I initially owed in college debt.

I think the system is jacked up! but since I have a job, which i need to have to keep all the other things I have, I dont have time to Occupy anywhere. My wife and family need me to work, and then they need me to spent time with them developing something very important, relationships.
Would I like more stuff? Would I like better stuff? If someone offered me more money to do what I do, would I take it? Duh! All of my cars are 10 years old and have major issues. The house I own, that due to a job loss, I do not actually live in, was built in the 40's. (which beats the house I owned befor that build in 1870 something) I dont have a smart phone, I recently ungraded to an unlimited texting plan. two years ago we purchased a computer for my wife, other than that, they are all hand me downs (freebies). In fact the computer we bought her was used.

Wall Street, the American goverment (not even its President), not even poverty can take my Family or my Faith from me. These things cannot strip me of the most valuable things in life, the relationship I have with the people most important to me and the relationship I have with God.

People using bailout money to give bonuses is totally screwed up... SERIOUSLY JACKED! Rich people getting richer, thats kind of life... Guess what, they cant take it with them.

Learn to be content with what you have, be smart with your money.

And most importantly Occupy the Homes of your Friends and Family, make a difference where it counts.

long time

Its been a long while since I have written. Would I have been more faithful if I was getting more reads and more comments? Maybe.

But life hits us right when we are trying to do something else.

I have thought over many blogs, and I regret that I have not written them down.

I have a great deal of people that I miss... this season in my life is strange. I am meeting lots of people but few of them live within a reasonable distance to hang out with.

Strange, isn't it when you meet someone you "just click" with. My wife and I spent a week at a training in a different part of the country and met several new people and hung out with some people we had met last year at a different training event.

On the last night of this years event, we played a little game, "greater than or less than." It is like the elementary school assignment when you determine which fraction is larger.... except with people.

For clarification it is not deciding which person has greater value or which has less. Rather, it is thinking about you would rather spend time with. And sure "would you rather" may have worked as a moniker, but it has an association with a less than pleasant game!

After talking through the couples and individuals at the event I thought about what mattered or should i say what was the qualifier for one person over another.

I determined it was about the energy required to be around that person. Some people are so easy to be around, its effortless. Other people, sometimes for no fault of their own, require just a little more energy. And then you have those people who are down right needy (and everyone else in between).

I would also like to point out that I do not believe any real relationship to be completely effortless. Relationship requires give and take, some relationships SEEM like there is less energy involved for the whole process.

last monday...

was obviously an annoying day.

About an hour or so after my post things got better. Which is good. I survived...

In other news:
People's sense of entitlement drives me nuts. I am a big nerd and have a few Nerf guns. And I was playing with neighborhood kids, with the Nerf guns, and I provided most of the guns and all of the darts. I dont mind doing that, its fun to be able have fun and spread the love. Come on, its better than the guns sitting in my closet.

But the kids that drove me the craziest were the ones that felt like they deserved whatever, in this case, gun, they wanted. The kids that made me happiest were those who were just happy to hang out and play. At one point we had 13 people playing... and I may be really nerdy but I dont have that many guns. So we used balled up socks just to give everyone a chance.

Back to the annoying ones. They were the first to grab at the weapons and the first to literally drop them. (when you were tagged you put the gun down, in case some sock wielding teammate had the chance to use it) its just amazing. But that is how some people are. They show up late and call "shotgun." (showing up late is selfish enough) They have to listen to the music they want to listen... when you are driving your car. You know the type, but it starts when they are younger... I hope my kids aren't like that.