I am not fast

I was significantly faster when was younger. But old age and lack of physical activity are getting the best of me.

But that is not what I really want to talk about. I want to talk about a "fast" or the spiritual discipline of fasting.

fast 2 (definition found at http://www.thefreedictionary.com/fasting)
(fst)
intr.v. fast·ed, fast·ing, fasts
1. To abstain from food.
2. To eat very little or abstain from certain foods, especially as a religious discipline.
n.
1. The act or practice of abstaining from or eating very little food.
2. A period of such abstention or self-denial.
[Middle English fasten, from Old English fæstan; see past- in Indo-European roots.]


I am not good at fasting, nor am I fast. While I may have been faster when I was younger, I have never really been good at fasting. I always want to do it for the wrong reasons. I am not a large man, but I often think that i can get double duty out of my fasting. The idea is to rely on God to be your source during the fast, focusing on Him, not weight loss. I tend to think of the latter. Often when I try and fast I spend more time thinking about when I can eat or what I can eat, depending on the type of fast. Again, pretty much missing the point.

Denial of self is good, it is helpful, when done right. If i walk around bragging about my fast, my focus is on ME, not God. If I think about the weight I am losing, then I am, again, focused on ME, not God. If I do not spend extra time in prayer, rather thinking about what I can eat, I am amiss.

Yesterday, I read a sports article about the top ten religious athletes, including Tebow, the Minister of Defense, Sandy Koufax and Hakeem Olajuwon. The piece on Olajuwon mentioned that he would fast through the month of Ramadan as per his Muslim faith and still play basketball. It said he would "play without food or water" for the month. Obviously nobody can survive a month without water, especially while playing a vigorous sport like professional basketball. The fast is from Dawn til dusk. This is still an impressive feat.

At times I have "fasted" thinks other than food. I gave up Facebook for a month one year. I felt like God wanted me to. So I did a beginning of the year fast from FB. It was great for me. More time to focus on other things, most importantly God.

I enjoy food. I really do. Is food distracting me from God like Facebook was? I doubt it. But for a few weeks here at the beginning of 2012 I have given up certain foods. I pray that I come out closer to God, hearing His voice more clearly and more dependant on Him.

While I could stand to lose a few pounds, and It will likely happen, I am not allowing that to be a focal point. In fact I am "fasting" from weighing myself. Realizing that probably sounds very strange, I have to admit I check my weight like a dieting teenage girl, something else I would like to change.